Friday, April 24, 2009

God loves me unconditionally

In my mind, I have 2 reflections which I wanted to post today. I started typing but I just felt that I could not continue so I left the draft. Somehow there's no flow when I tried typing even though it is clear in my mind what I wanted to share.

Now I guess I know why. The Holy Spirit brought to remembrance a revelation I received at the beginning of last week. When I was spending my quiet time with the Lord last Monday, I began to give thanks to Him and express my appreciation for what He has done in my life thus far. As I recounted how the Lord has led me and kept me, I began to reflect on how great is His love for me. And it felt good to know that God loves me. But then, at the same time I felt a check within me. When I meditated upon His love for me, there was a mixture of a sense of gratefulness and a sense of "self-worthiness". This seemed strange (at first).

As I continued to quieten myself, it became more apparent to me. This impure way of thinking in my mind has been residing inside me quite a while. Almost every instance when I reflect on His love for me in the past, at the back of my mind, unknowingly I would think that "God must have loved me because of some right things I've done" or "God must have loved me because He likes certain part of my character or nature". In short, it was like, something about me or what I've done that caused God to love me.

Then, in the most gentlest manner, the Holy Spirit impressed in my heart that God loves me unconditionally. It was repeated a few times in my heart, God loves me unconditionally, God loves me unconditionally...

It's the most simplest revelation but it is a powerful revelation. All these years as a Christian, I've heard more than thousands of time about God's agape love, i.e. that His love is without condition. In fact, I have even taught and shared about this subject in the past. Knowing it in my mind and mentally assenting to a truth does not mean that I have fully received the truth. Wow, it's such a liberating truth! God loves me UNCONDITIONALLY all the time.

There may be times when due to fatigue or laziness, I would have skipped my normal set times with the Lord. If I do not guard my heart, a little accusation of condemnation would creep in quietly. Though uninvited, this sense of condemnation would continue to build up if I entertain it and it would then turn to guilt. This would be damaging. It would then alter the basis of my relationship and communion with God. I draw near to Him for greater intimacy because of love. I long for Him and I hunger for Him because He first loved me. My basis of drawing near to Him and spending time in His presence is not to get rid of my guilt or condemnation. It is not and should never be on the basis of duty or some kind of legalistic requirement. That's why the revelation that God loves me unconditionally is so liberating!

When I feel weak or far from the Him, my sould need not fret. The source of Unconditional Love is not far. It's right inside me. I just need to locate the river of Love inside me and flow in the river of His love. The peace will return and worship will rise up within me again. Let us soak in His unconditional love each moment of every day because our Beautiful Saviour loves us unconditionally.
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